


Astoria's List

by asequenceofbaddecisions



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child - Thorne & Rowling
Genre: Book: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, Father-Son Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Spoilers, Hogwarts, One Shot Collection, Series of Coherent One Shots, but also not?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-20
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-17 17:49:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13082100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asequenceofbaddecisions/pseuds/asequenceofbaddecisions
Summary: "I decided to leave you and Scorpius a list. My list. Mum's list."After Astoria's death, the Malfoy family is lost among pride, emotions and grief. However, hope can be found in the darkest of times, even in the form of a simple list.(Concept loosely based on the book/film "Mum's List", based true story in which a mother leaves her children a list to complete after she is gone - I do not intend any copyright infringement!)





	Astoria's List

**Forgive yourself**

The funeral of Astoria Malfoy (née Greengrass) was a quiet and personal affair. There were five attendees, and it was held in a modest Muggle church an hour’s journey from her former home. Astoria’s sister – Daphne Greengrass – was present for the service, but left shortly after. Pansy Parkinson, who only came to support Daphne, followed suit. Neither wanted to waste too much time in a Muggle establishment. Albus Potter spent a while in silence sat next to his friend, but was eventually swept away by his father (whose eyes were full of unsought pity). Draco Malfoy instructed his son not to follow him before leaving the chapel, his steely gaze locked firmly on the ground. And Scorpius Malfoy wept.

For hours, Scorpius sobbed unceasingly, lost in a whirlwind of trauma, distress, misery and _agony_. His body trembled inconsolably, a response he did not resist, allowing silent tears to soak his reddened face. He sat, planted in the same pew (second row from the front), until the pale moonlight began to illuminate the tear tracks coating his cheeks, and the minister placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to guide him out the door. Neither Malfoy remembers their journey home. Draco swiftly departed for his office without a word to his son, the same eyes of steel zeroed in on the floor. Scorpius slumped onto the mahogany stairs and cried again. Both ignored the sprawling pile of condolence letters layering the floor in the hallway.

It was only days later when Draco found it. Expression vacant and hollow, drowning in the perpetual silence of his soulless home, he finally managed to face his bedroom. Their bedroom. Every day since the funeral, he had slept in his study, only moving between his desk, his chair, and the window at infrequent intervals. His mother had been and gone, merely making it to the front door before hesitating and walking away. Other ministry folk had arrived to offer ‘administrative support’, but never received a response to their knocking. It was only when Draco caught sight of his son appearing in the doorway that he decided it was time to move. Scorpius only lingered for a moment, red-rimmed eyes peeking through a crack in the door at his defeated father as if to check he wasn’t dead too. This led Draco to his bedroom, where he found the letter.

_Draco, this is Astoria._

The thin parchment in Draco’s hand began to flutter as his grip loosened.

_I decided to leave you and Scorpius a list. My list. Mum’s list._

He sank onto the bed.

_Keep me alive, in your heads and in your hearts, but don’t let my death overwhelm you.  This is my legacy – make these promises, and I’ll be with you, forever and ever. Love, Astoria._

Draco read the letter, again and again, and again and again, drinking in every word of his wife’s final desires. Turning the parchment, he found the list – Astoria’s list. Twenty thoughts and emotions and wishes from her deathbed, all curling and looping across the page in a delicate string of hope and ink, intertwining the next life and now. And Draco Malfoy finally wept. He cried for his dead wife, his trembling son, his disdainful mother, and his dismal, lonely future. He sobbed for hours into his pillow, the scent of Astoria constantly fading.

Then a voice emerged from the blackness.

“It’s not your fault, dad.”

Draco shot awake, bleary-eyed and red-cheeked, scrambling towards the headboard. The darkened figure of his son at the foot of the bed looked almost spectral. “Scorpius--”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Get out, you shouldn’t—"

“You have a letter too?”

Draco’s eyes flicked between the paper hanging limply from his son’s hand, and the tear-stained parchment positioned on his bedside table. “From Astoria?”

“From mum.”

There was a beat of silence, neither Malfoy knowing quite what to say.

“She told me to forgive you,” Scorpius stammered, losing confidence by the second, “And… to get you to forgive yourself. To tell you that it’s not your fault.” He swallowed thickly. “Otherwise you would _never_ forgive yourself.”

Draco cowed away, somehow unsettled by his son’s presence.

“It’s not your fault, dad.” Another tear escaped Draco’s eye, quickly to be swiped away. “There was nothing you could do. It’s not. I promise.”

“You _promise_!” Draco half-scoffed.

“I promise.” There was another beat. Scorpius tugged at his unkempt hair. “I made you scrambled eggs.”

Draco hesitated, then allowed a wavering smile to flicker onto his face. “T-thank you. Scorpius.”

Scorpius took this as an acceptance and nodded hurriedly, before shuffling towards the kitchen. Draco stood, letting his fingers brush over Astoria’s letter, before exiting the room.

_Mum’s List_

  1. _Forgive yourself._



**Author's Note:**

> I intend this to almost be like a series of one-shots, all linked together by the overarching storyline (please forgive the short chapter and bleak tone - I promise it will get more positive!) - also thank you for all the great feedback on my other work; I know I have been gone quite a while but it has made my day to see the comments!


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